2004-11-30
Clowns
I'm not certain as to how I would dwell, were my life only spent behind the stuffy corridors of academia; arguing and over exhausting texts and meanings, which, in all reality pose no significance to me whatsoever. I don't know how I would deal if the rest of my life were to be spent as it is that grueling 1 hr. 45 min. each morning...in English Lit.
I despise that class--everything about it. The ultimate clash of egos--snot-faced kids fiercely competing for the title of English Prodigy 2004-05. And, in all honesty, I don't really mind the over-inflated egos...the heavy mightier than thou essence, distilled in mid-air.
Rather, it all boils down to: are we even mature enough to do what it is we are doing?
I understand that this is all part of "the growing process"...for my part, I feel that I've yet to grow in my writing. I've a long way to go, and I realize that.
It would be far easier to save the verbiage and get to it--clarity is courage--and explain why it is that I am so upset...what we in the Spanish language call el colmo; or, for English speakers, the last straw.
We've been reading, discussing, and analyzing (to a pulp), "The Yellow Wallpaper". The past two weeks have been utter Hell for me.
I've had to sit down in class and listen to ridiculous statements such as, Well, what if she's already crazy, and the house is the insane asylum?
or (and this is my favorite) ...Obviously, this is symbolic of a rebirth...and the rope is representative of an umbilical cord...the white eyes she sees on the wall resemble the birthing process...
and last, but certain not least: This story is obviously about feminism...
I'm here, furiously typing down on my laptop and trying to get everything out at once...
OK: fuck you! fuck you! and definitely, fuck you! And that is how I resolve my qualms with literary criticisms (critics beware, if I ever become a novelist).
My question is: are we analyzing an deconstructing or are we simply pulling things out of our asses to impress the teacher, thus gaining the title of "Brilliant" for the duration of the class period?
And so, our esteemed professor may have criticized me (slightly, mind you) for "redundancy"...I will say--in my defense--that not relating invasion of tiny little aliens to "The Yellow Wallpaper" does not necessarily imply redundance or lack of originality...you ASS!
While the option of dropping AP English Lit is enticing...I will never do it. Certainly, it's a class full of clowns; but I couldn't leave--I will not leave!
For extra credit (or effort) the teacher would like us to do "The Waste Land" at the end of the year...because there's always the risk that it may be mentioned on the AP Exam (along with "The Love Song...").
Honestly, I'm shivering...for a class who'd rather do an entire unit on sea-chanteyes, I'm rather skeptical. Thus, if/when we get to "The Waste Land", I wouldn't be surprised to hear comments such as: T.S. Eliot's "The Waste Land" is obviously representative hardcore feminism...post Alien attacks. We obviously need to pay attention to the fact that he begins by mentioning the month of April...no doubt an ominous date in Alien calendars...
Am I disturbed? Indeed!