2004-07-01
Life, as it is...
In front of me on this unshakingly beautiful afternoon is a stone brick wall running back and forth throughout this earthly garden of peace and tranquility. I listen to Bach�s violin sonatas and the tunes dance gently in the back of my head.
This moment has reached perfection.
Lampposts everywhere to light up the night with soft orange light accompanying the pearl moon. Quaint rooftops and trees of so many shades of gentle green. Pines and Maples looming in the background as black crows and hummingbirds fly around. The occasional butterfly lightly flaps its thin wings.
A delicious afternoon, and all of the senses come to life. Moral decay and an internal dilemma plague me.
I begin to wonder if telling him that I wanted to completely sever contact was prudent, and if so, why can�t I stop ruminating over it?
It was, because for the first time ever, I want to try and do something that I wouldn�t normally do�let go completely and try to live with haunting memories despite whatever it is that they begin to inspire: pathos, loathing, anguish, love.
And the dusky sunlight blankets this sea of soft grass, and I know�in the very depths of my heart�that I did the correct thing.
Still, I am but one leaf that is carried by that same river whose forceful current does not allow me to turn back. Why should we turn back? There is nothing in the past but inevitable mistakes that one never anticipated, and the future is uncertain and doesn�t even appear to me so clearly anymore. My vision of life is no longer circumscribed or so pragmatic. I see softness and beauty within this peaceful earth, and finally�for the first time�I am reminded of how much I love to write with the summer breeze kissing my cheek.
I realize that I am�and always have been�alone and lost in the profundity of my own quixotic nature. I am reminded of how much I enjoy finding solace in the babbling brook to whom I confess my secrets through a heavy sigh, and to any downed pillow to whom I endow my glass tears of sorrow.
My soul feels calm�at complete peace like the ocean at dusk�with billowy and beautifully lethargic emotions slowly swimming throughout. I love this moment that calls upon the imagination, and memories fly up to me like ghosts, but fail to touch me through my crystal wall.
Perhaps I should build another crystal wall more durable and impenetrable than the last. I want to sit here and wait until the street lamps turn on. The bells toll in the Cathedral.
In front of me on this unshakingly beautiful afternoon�
Quando sono solo
sogno all'orizzonte
e mancan le parole
si lo so che non c'� luce
in una stanza quando manca il sole
se non ci sei tu con me
Su le finestre
mostra a tutti il mio cuore
che hai acceso
chiudi dentro me
la luce che
hai incontrato per strada
Con te partir� -
Paesi che non ho mai
veduto e vissuto con te
adesso s� li vivr�
Con te partir�
su navi per mari
che io lo so
no, no, non esistono pi�
con te io li vivr�
Quando sei lontana -
sogno all'orizzonte
e mancan le parole
e io s� lo so
che sei con me
tu mia luna tu sei qui con me
mio sole tu sei qui con me
con me con me
Con te partir� -
Paesi che non ho mai
veduto e vissuto con te
adesso s� li vivr�
Con te partir�
su navi per mari
che, io lo so
no, no, non esistono pi�
con te io li rivivr� v
Con te partir� -
su navi per mari
che, io lo so
no, no, non esistono pi�
con te io li rivivr�
Con te partir�
Io con te
--Andrea Bocelli