2003-11-30
Family is like poison to the rose that is my happiness
Last night--family get together for grandmum's birthday. I believe that it is safe to say that everyone showed up (including my cousin and her husband, whom I was reluctant to speak to for fear of whatever) I, on the other hand was at David's party, where I believe it is safe to say that I had a most ::clears throat:: exhilarating time. I feel a bit guilty for leaving and not even saying happy birthday to my grandmother, but I want to make clear that I hold family in the lowest regards. These people are no closer to me than the racoon which climbs my tree in the late evening hours. I see them as complete and absolute strangers who do nothing but fuel my depression. I'm going to admit that I am depressed regardless of whether I live with my family or if I live alone. However, being depressed and surrounded by a few select friends is much more blissful than being depressed and surrounded by family. I can only guess at the incessant gossip circulating among the family members right now (my family, they make it possible so that news of the misfortune or criticism of others travels at one-fourth the speed of light).
If I had a choice to live with these people or commit suicide, I'd choose the latter.